FUNNY SIGNS FOUND ON REAL BUSINESSES
Sign on an electrician's truck: Let us remove your shorts.
Maternity Clothes Shop: We are open on labor day.
Non-smoking area: If we see you smoking we will assume you
on fire and take appropriate action.
On a Maternity Room Door: Push, Push, Push
On a Front Door: Everyone on
the premises is a vegetarian except the dog.
Optometrist's Office: If you don't see what you're looking
for, you've come to the right place.
Scientist's Door: Gone Fission
Taxidermist Window: We really know our stuff.
Podiatrist's Window: Time wounds all heels.
Butcher's window: Let me meat your
needs.
Used Car Lot: Second Hand cars in first crash condition
Sign on Fence: Salesmen
welcome. Dog food is expensive.
Car Dealership: The best
way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.
Muffler Shop: No appointment necessary. We'll hear you
coming.
Hotel:
"Help!" We need inn - experienced people.
Butcher's Window: Pleased to meat
you.
Auto Body Shop: May we
have the next dents?
Sign in an office: We shoot every 3rd salesman,
and the 2nd one just left.
Veterinarians Waiting Room: Be back in 5 minutes. Sit!
Stay!
The Electric Company: We would be delighted if you send in
your bill. However, if you don't, you will be.
Beauty Shop: Dye now!
Garbage Truck: We've got what it takes to take
what you've got.
Computer Store: Out for a quick byte
Diner Window: Don't stand there and be hungry,
come in and get fed up.
Bowling Alley: Please be quiet. We need
to hear a pin drop.
Cafeteria: Shoes are required
to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want.
Music Library: Bach in a minuet.
Funeral Home: Drive carefully, we'll wait.
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